If you don’t know this by now, Raid and I are big fans of Urata Naoya. We were waiting for the release of his solo album, TURN OVER, for ages. Since it was announced that he’d be working on a solo project, at least.
Somewhere along the way, it went totally wrong, and based on the web reactions (for example, Brett over at Kurayami Monogatari and Noah at stylejapan), there are definitely people out there who love it. Us, on the other hand? We’re not entirely impressed. Or maybe that’s just me. Raid’s the one you want for lines like “OMGAH THIS SUCKS”, after all.
Something I’ve noticed during my stint in various fandoms is that people are loyal. If they obsessively like something, then they will support anything related to it, no matter how distantly related it is. For example, when the music of ORANGE RANGE’s KIRIKIRIMAI was used in the Fantastic Four movie’s motorbike stunt scene, there was a huge buzz. Never mind that not a second of the vocals showed up, or that it wouldn’t be on the soundtrack. It was in the movie! People went to watch the movie for that reason alone!
Not me. I don’t have the attention span to stick with fandoms to the point of micromanagement. You see, somehow, over the course of the two weeks in which I kept the Music Station episode on which both Arashi and Tohoshinki/DBSK/”SCREW THIS NAMING SCHEME, SM, I GIVE UP” appeared to promote and perform their latest singles, I ended up becoming a definite fan of the latter. There are dreams, there is the knowing of songs without really looking up the lyrics (and this is really harder because the Tohorangers still have accents, and I only listen to their Japanese releases of yet), and there is the looking up of variety appearances.
Honestly, I only have the attention span for one #-member boyband at a time. The instant I became a fan of V6, any consideration for NEWS was immediately shoved out of my head – KAT-TUN was never in the running. Kanjani8 used to not get any love because NEWS was also formerly 8 members, and they still don’t because AAA now also has 7 members. Tackey & Tsubasa don’t have a chance against KinKi, and while I tried to get into SMAP and TOKIO a lot more than I currently am – which is still saying something – they never could surpass Arashi. (Luckily for w-inds., there are few, if any other, 3-member boybands in Japan.) But somehow, the Tohorangers (perhaps due in part to my nicknaming them the “Tohorangers”) are edging their way in there.
And so it is only appropriate that the single I next review is their 23rd, どうして君を好きになってしまったんだろう? [Doushite Kimi wo Suki ni Natte Shimattan darou?] At least they were kind enough to provide a song to help explain my feelings.
In the last quarter of 2006, I watched Remote starring Domoto Koichi and became a fan of Tsuyoshi’s Toilet-on-a-White-Horse. (Unless you’re a KinKi fan, spare yourselves and don’t ask. And even if you are, spare yourself and don’t ask.)
In the last quarter of 2007, I watched Yamada Taro Monogatari starring Ninomiya Kazunari and Sakurai Sho and was condemned to being just another of the many in the ranks of overseas Johnny’s fans.
In the last week of 2008, I watched the music video for 呪文－MIROTIC－ [Jumon -MIROTIC-] by Tohoshinki/Dong Bang Shin Ki/TVXQ/that group with far too many names for my liking and am now endangered.
I’ve been informed that I’m pretty lacking as an AAA fan of late, and also because I’ve sort of just left them hanging on this blog. This is apparently not allowed, and justice must be done, especially before their next album comes up.
So let’s go back in time a bit and finish up with the boys-only efforts, before they stopped being an actual boyband and went back to being a boyband with two (possibly 4) girls in it. I’m referring, of course, to the official release, CHOICE IS YOURS.
Well, it’s been over a full year since I last did one of these. And why yes, this is oooooooooold. Half a year old. But I started this before my school term started again, before my Internet crashed, and before I lost my faithful laptop of 6-7 years. I have it, I poured hours into it, and so this is getting stuck up here anyways. Give it a look through anyways – if you have my taste in music you may find something new. Or you may just have fun when I poke fun too.
“…sex is a Texas drought.” I wasn’t entirely sure whether to title this post “Baby Got Bang” or “Baby Go Back”, but then I decided to pay homage to the Bloodhound Gang’s The Animal Song. It’s a song that will always be a classic source of nostalgia (oh, late nights in middle school watching VH1’s Insomnia and late night MTV when it was still about the music), and a karaoke staple.
Sacrilegious though it may be (especially given my past track record), I sort of wish I could say the same about the promotional track off Urata Naoya’s upcoming album. Instead, Baby Bang! feat. SPHERE isn’t likely to head that way anytime soon.
I must give the song its props. It’s a dance track so it’ll make perfect use of Urata’s dancing chops, and based off the group dance shots in the video he’ll have a good performance to show us with this song. It grows on you too, if you haven’t outright decided that you hate it. Urata spends most of the track in a falsetto and his higher range, too, so when SPHERE makes his grand entrance it makes a perfect contrast. All the same, I’m hoping that the rest of the album doesn’t keep him in this area, because it will hurt to listen to within the first three days.
What I can’t stand is the video. It’s just ridiculous. The aforementioned group dance shots work. Urata walking down the empty street towards the camera? Come home to mama, baby (bang!). The solo dance shots with the paint-splattered backgrounds are nice too. But Urata’s solo scenes where he’s in that ridiculously colored hoodie, moving spastically against a metal closed-store grate, with equally horribly-colored lighting… y’know, I love a shot of pop star nipple as much as the next person, but not at the cost of my eyes. No, man, you can not get a kiss. That was just not sexy. SPHERE’s also pretty stupid looking when he’s not walking down the street. Stick with the street, guys, even if there’s an oncoming car. It’s really better for your image.
Even worse are the scenes where he molests a random Caucasian lady. Oh, I’m all for the molesting. It was really rather hot, even if she clearly didn’t think so. I’m just not for the goopy blue paint. What is this, a new form of protection? Thick blue paint will not stop your guy cooties from reaching her. It just makes her look more ugly and less sexually attractive. Actually, when the video started with her, it’d gotten to the point where I’m not even sure she was sexually attractive to begin with. Hell, even Urata has a guilty look as he smears the paint all over her limbs. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to kill your skin cells like this.”
I’m still looking forward to this release, between Urata and the revelation that KURO (of HOME MADE KAZOKU) had a hand in the lyrics of a song, but avex is trying a bit too hard to not remind us that the man is already 26. Or turn him into a male Amuro Namie where we can’t remember he’s 26… and either way, it’s not working.
If you’re an AAA fan and an astute reader of this blog, you’ll notice that their most recent single hasn’t been mentioned at all. Of course, some people might excuse it because of the promotion of the boys-only mini-album around the same time. Others might bring up that I was on a hiatus (if unannounced) from my ramblings.
For the past month and a half, that most recent single didn’t exist for me. In fact, have a quote from a forum conversation over AAA’s periods for me.
AAA 2005-October 2006 = growing into it. (Let us never bring back Hallelujah’s cornrows, Nissy.)
AAA November 2006-June 2007 = smoking hot and working the “idol” concept.
AAA July 2007-September 2007 = duck-ing. (As in, being like a duck. Not ducking under something. Though they did a lot of that too.)
AAA October 2007-January 2008 = experimental.
AAA February 2008-June 2008 = My fanhood is ashamed.
And that last line? Can all be blamed on BEYOND～カラダノカナタ [BEYOND~KARADA NO KANATA].
Having seen the above picture, having seen the title… perhaps the first question that comes to your mind is “Why?” Why am I reviewing Amuro Namie’s 60s 70s 80s now, a full month after its release? Why, after everyone and their mother (who probably loved this sort of music because it was in her heyday) have said all they’ve had to say about it? And why, when I specifically said I was going to focus on groups this year?
Because:
1) Patrick (who you may know over at Who’s Afraid of Music?), the Namie fan that he is, asked for it. Also, I’ve never been a timely person. Just ask my history professor.
2) I have a slightly different opinion from everyone else on a certain song, apparently. *shockgasphorror* And it really just isn’t because I like to be anti-mainstream. (If you’re even thinking that, have you read this blog at all?)
3) I’m a liar.
Sadly, most general knowledge of Japanese idol girl groups (outside of Japan – within the country’s boundaries is a subject I’m not qualified to touch on) is limited to two things. The avex image hipsters, SPEED (though you can replace this with other avex girl groups like dream, usually it’s limited to only one of them), and the doggedly persistent institution of Hello! Project. If you dig deeper, you’ll find people who know of AKB48 – but more for their sheer numbers (which Bishoujo Club 31 never quite accomplished) and for acknowledging their otaku fanbase. Which doesnt bode well for acts like Bright (who, despite tinging their act with gospel, still managed to have me find their debut mini-album on the $7 shelf at Book-off the same week it came out), nor assure us of the future of now disbanded SweetS. Never mind any recognition for much lesser-known groups like Earth and Pipo’s Angels. The age of the female idol in Japan is over -you have to be something, most preferably sexy, or be left aside. Considering how long female pop idols held court in Japan – and I think back to the days of Super Monkeys, never mind Pink Lady and Onyanko Club – and the constantly evolving image of the female ideal, it’s about time. It’s a sad truth for people like me who like girl groups but don’t like the music of H!P or AKB48. (On the bright side, the pretty boys are girly enough to be girl groups with additional “appendages”…)
So it’s been four years now since I first (and last) heard of AKINA, the former lead vocalist of girl group Folder 5. After Folder 5 disbanded, she had what seems like a short solo career – only three singles to her solo name. But it was one single a year up until 2004, when she shut up completely. Three years for only three singles (Touch me, which this post touches on; One wish; BEST OF LOVE) out of a girl who had pop singing and dancing chops, along with a gorgeous face, established fanbase (there was a reason they pushed her in front for Folder 5 though she was the youngest), slight creative capabilities before it became mandatory to have something to do with your music for popularity’s sake, and industry experience – was avex just wasting away the rest of her contract with them then? (Because after four years of musical silence – and a radioshow doesn’t count - it’s pretty moot now.)
